I recently overheard a conversation while paying for my meal at a very cozy restaurant. A very elderly couple came in to sit down. You could tell from the way the hostess received them that hey frequently ate at this restaurant. As they were sitting down, I took notice at how politely the elderly man pulled out the chair for his wife as she calmly and slowly sat down. Once they sat down, the waitress came over and the as she began to ask for what beverages they would like to order, the elderly man asked her "Are you married?"
Now this sudden question really caught my attention. I had noticed she was an attractive young lady and to have him ask her such a direct question just took me by surprise. The first thing I thought was wow that is so disrespectful for him to ask her that with his own wife right there beside him. Was he flirting? And as the waitress began to open up and tell him that she had been married three times and had three boys of her own. The man replied "well I have been married sixty four years, and today is our anniversary!" (You could easily pick up from his voice how very proud of this he was)
As I stood there, first feeling like an idiot for thinking such things as I did once he asked that question. I suddenly began to ponder on what a rare and amazing achievement it was for people to be married for so long! But in the same sense, I felt very comforted to know that marriage, although tarnished by the statistics we face today is still something that is sacred to some.
I believe in marriage, the sacrament, the vow, the promise, the commitment, the love, the fact that God is part of this wonderful union and that it's meant to last forever. And I am not talking about this fantasy like mental picture that girls carry in their minds of the perfect dress, reception, guy, maid of honor, bridesmaid and all that would entail the details of such a celebration. I am, rather, speaking of the love that is brought to the altar, before God our Father and of the loyal promise one exchanges with the other standing in front of them. Knowing that a covenant is being exchanged between two souls that will never find a reason to part, never find a way to doubt or distrust, but always keep the hope alive that every day that passes and every day the share together is just another way of giving glory to God. I am not a romantic by nature, not at all but I am a believer. I believe in what marriage stands for and that there are NO exit strategies when it comes to marriage. It's work it out and let God be the center of everything you do.
I may or may not get married in this life time, this is up to God and his will for me. But I am not going to not keep that option open because I see how others may treat marriage. I rather be the exception to that rule. And I would like to be able to celebrate my sixty fourth wedding anniversary just as I saw the married couple do that day. Love is, and always be, for me a most beautiful thing. God is Love....and LOVE never fails.
Maria ;)
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1 comment:
My dearest Maria Isabel,
What a lovely and beautiful post. Too many people get caught up in the nonessentials instead of focusing on the true essence of Marriage. The man you wrote about shows the tremendous love and respect he has for his beloved by his simple act of pulling the chair out for her. He never forgot that this woman deserves the utmost love, respect, and admiration. And, as you said to be married 64 years is a remarkable achievement. What a wonderful gift from God. Marriage is valuing the other person more than you value your own life with only God coming before that other person. To find that special someone who understands you completely and then decide that only God comes before that other person is true love and devotion. What an incredible blessing!!! Marriage is not pie in the sky as there will be many difficulties, but the main goal of marriage, which may or may not include the extra blessing of children is the opportunity to help someone become a saint- to reach the Altar of God. I may never know the beauty of a marriage of 64 years, but sometimes, 64 years is not needed. God takes us home when we have finished our tasks and for some the beauty of marriage may only be a relatively short time. But in the beauty of the Holy Sacrament of Matrimony, one has the opportunity for so many glorious and profound moments of growth. To lift that person up. To care for them, To cherish them, To laugh with them, To cry with them, To inspire them, To worry about them, To pray with them, To go to Mass with them, To walk with them. To comfort them. To love them. What a great opportunity, that with only a mirada, the beloveds can understand what the other is thinking and with a mere holding of hands, galaxies collide and the angels sing of so glorious a union and a sweet gentile smile comes to Our Lord and Master’s face. The very thought and action of God, in His Divine Plan, introducing two people together and although many apparent obstacles exist, He still makes it easier for the two to live happily, for nothing can stop His Divine Plan, not people, nor time, nor places. May God bless you always for you are a very gifted and wonderful writer.
Your servant and champion,
Elisha
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